Just the thought of losing a parent is excruciating. Our parents are the most iconic and important people in our lives, and it does not matter if we are in contact with them or not because losing either one will put anyone through many emotional changes.
We all eventually will die at some point in our life so we will have to come to terms of losing someone who was a close part of our life. However, death is a normal thing that happens through life, and these truths can help you aid through it:
The Feeling of Alone
At one point or another, every one of us has experienced the feeling of being alone. However, when you lose a parent, this feeling becomes way deeper than you’re used to. All of a sudden you will feel a different type of alone once the realization comes to you that your dad or mom will never come back. This is one of the most heartbreaking stages you will ever go through, however, this pain will eventually go away and you will go on with your life. Eventually, you will learn how to live without the missing piece. Even though you will not have the physical connection anymore, the spiritual connection will still exist and you will still have all of the memories that you have made with your parent over the years.
Endure Systems Change
The advice that the parents give is some of the best and once you lose a big member of your support system, it will take some time to get back on track with dreams, accomplishments, and goals. All of us need to think of the memories that we have in order for them to guide us. Mom or Dad will still help guide you whether they are gone or not. Even though you won’t be able to see them or hear them, they will always guide you through the advice and motivations that they’ve given you throughout your life.
Coping with the loss of a parent is a very unique experience and all of us handle the loss in different ways. The low energy phase is one of the most common stages that many of us enter when losing a parent. Coping with the death of a loved one is never easy for anyone and you should not expect much from yourself when the time comes. You need to practice healing and acceptance. Staying in bed when needed is always allowed, but remember that you need to live your life, it is not worth giving away, and your parents would want you to do exactly that.
You Will Never Get Over It
This is one of the hardest truths. No matter what amount of time passes, you will always feel the void of losing your parent. Even though you should never get over it, you will need to learn how to grow as a person from it. Death can be a hard step to go through, but it is still a step and once you accept that, you will realize that the time that we have in this world is limited. We need to make our lives worth living by creating new stories and memories. Your mom and dad will wait for you on the flip side when your time is up. Until that time comes, make them proud.
When seeing people with their parents, you will feel a different way after losing one of yours. You might even feel a form of anger towards people that have more time with their parents but choose not to treasure it. When you lose a parent, your negative feelings towards others need to be pushed aside. However, you can use your words gently in order to make the people remember that one phone call can make a great memorable conversation. Even sending a letter or planning a dinner together can lead to a long term of good memories.
You’ll Regret Mistakes
No matter how hard you are beating yourself up because of the mistakes you’ve made, you will never be able to change the past. Even little things that you wish you have done differently can be a problem after you suffer the loss of a parent. You may start thinking about the times you were supposed to visit and spend time with them but didn’t. However, it is very unlikely that your Mom or Dad is thinking about those insignificant or bad memories on the flip side. They won’t be thinking about the time that you were supposed to visit but didn’t. So you should follow the positive memories and feelings as well. Think about all of the best moments and memories you’ve had with them, and stop leaching to the things that you cannot change.
Grief should not be taken lightly. It is an individualized phase which can take weeks, months, or even years. But no matter how much time you need to start feeling better, it will all be worth it in the end. You can even call up a therapist or a counselor if you want to.
If you do not want to tackle the mental health and grief on your own, make sure you find a professional that can help you in your area.